Don't Tear Yourself Down

I once heard someone say she repeated things over and over again to the point of exhaustion out of sheer perfectionism. Our work must have quality but the pursuit of perfection should not be destructive.

Are you able to exercise self-compassion when you feel you have not done as well as you wanted to?

Do you engage in negative self-evaluation?

Do you use second-person language when criticizing yourself?

Are you realistic about your goals or demand too much of yourself and too soon?

Do you blame negative events on all-encompassing, permanent aspects of yourself?

Do you focus too much on protecting your own self-esteem?

Do you pursue self-image goals instead of compassionate goals?

When things don't work out the way you wanted or expected, do you feel worthless and incompetent?

Can you roll with the punches of life in a positive and realistic way?

Do you remind yourself that "tomorrow will be another day" and "we can try again"?

Do you struggle with increasing procrastination and rumination

Do you get stressed out about any impending goal progress?

Do you feel you're becoming depressed and suffering from health issues because of mounting stress?

Do you feel like there's no point in even trying to do better next time?

When you stare at a challenge in your path, do you fall apart or do you make plans to overcome it?

Do you fill yourself with self-doubt?

Do you come up with self-created problems due to harsh standards and internalized social values for self-evaluation and expectations?

Are you too hard on yourself?

Are you unsure of your thoughts, feelings, and emotions?

Are you avoiding things you could or should be doing and self-sabotaging your own life experiences?

Do you run away from challenges out of a fear of failure?

Do you feel like you are constantly getting in your own way or at least, in the way of your own progress?

Do you limit your own personal or professional growth out of fear or insecurity?

Do you feel out of control or inferior to others?

Do you have a difficult time being assertive and communicating your needs to others?

Are you robbing yourself of peace of mind and of mental strength?

Do you engage in toxic self-criticism

Do you identify your strengths and encourage them?

Do you challenge negative self-talk?

Journal honestly about these topics.

If your self-criticism has become too active and aggressive, to the point of being harmful or

paralyzing, enlist the support from family and friends or someone who can counsel you and 

help bring things under control.